I’m returning to work from 12 weeks of maternity leave. While my brain in still foggy and I don’t expect to sleep though the night for the next 18 years, I am constantly overwhelmed by how blessed I am to have these children. I also stand amazed each day by how much love God actually allows us to feel for another person.
Although I was on leave, I still managed to work most days, even an hour or so if I could get my children to sleep at the same time. In addition to my duties as “mama,” (feeding, bathing, diapering, taking them to the doctor, keeping up with their shots, fearing H1N1, nap schedules, documenting with lives with photos and video, potty training my two-year old, helping my daughter adjust to being a big sister, finding adequate childcare, etc., etc.) work, my household, my marriage, church activities, and life in general just seemed too much for one person to handle each day. Most days I found myself unshowered and in tears by lunch. I marveled how two little humans could need so much and how I could continually feel as if I did not have enough to give them. Enough undivided attention, enough patience, creativity in parenting, … But I never doubted that I loved them enough or that they felt that.
I understand how lucky I am to have so many stresses. I am thankful to have these children, this job, my husband, my house, my church and everything else, and know how typical my little stressors are to every family.
On the days that I feel overwhelmed by life’s demands and unable to be everything for everyone, I always hear God whisper, “My grace is sufficient for you” (I Corinthians 12:9). When I don’t know how to discipline my daughter, or think of my friend whose husband is in ICU, or think of the victims of sexual servitude that weigh on my heart, God’s message to each of us is the same – “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”
